Not too long ago...
In an association fairly close-by...
There was a periodical named The Havoceur, which was later renamed
The
Havoc. The Havoc was issued sporadically, as it was originally the
"underground newspaper" of the association. As its popularity grew
it
seemed to lose its purpose and slowly faded away.
I, among many, have missed those issues of the Havoc ~ they were
great
fun, often quite funny, and a welcome break from the rigors of the
battlefield. Please welcome the new, but not necessarily improved,
::Insert appropriate fanfare::
IAAPA Havoc
Notes From the Front (Face-to-face
Division)
Every player, no matter the sport, no matter the game, has his own
unique style of play, his own superstitions, his own pre-game routines,
his own idiosyncrasies. The Knight was recently informed of the
eccentric habits of a certain member of the IAAPA government; High
Cmmdr, the Minister of Tournaments, to be specific.
The Commander recently hosted two grizzled IAAPA veterans for three
days
of Axis and Allies gaming. SoTragic (known in some circles as Lord
Pez)
and AxisSpec were the Commander's guests (and A&A whipping-boys)
in
beautiful Lehi, Utah.
On the second day of the mini-conference AxisSpec, suffering from
jet
lag, stumbled from the bedroom to the kitchen table to find HC and
ST
mildly building fortresses in Eastern Europe and Karelia. AS glanced
about the board, then noticed two infantrymen placed upon tiny pedestals
of control markers off to the side of the board. He puzzled over
these
two wayward pieces, but couldn't determine their purpose. He finally
asked the Commander what those two infantrymen represented.
HC replied, "Oh! Those are Hall of Famers!" and then went into detailed
descriptions of how those brave infantrymen had survived several
enemy
assaults. He then began to detail the enemy casualties inflicted
by
these 'Hall of Famers', but even the normally stoic HC couldn't
keep a
straight face when AS began laughing uncontrollably.
Although I was unable to verify this, I was told that AS swallowed
his
tongue in the midst of that hysterical outburst.
On the third and final day of their A&A marathon, SoTragic and
AxisSpec
were hard at work trying to thwart a Magic 84 victory by Hapless
Commander. The Japanese had controlled Brazil for several rounds
and the
US was preparing a counterassault. ST and AS agreed that Brazil's
liberation was imperative. The US purchased a sub to lead the naval
assault, and a bomber squadron was reassigned to Western Europe
~ upon
completion of its final bombing mission over Southern Europe. Morale
remained high, along with expectations, even after the Bomber squadron
was obliterated by Italian AA units. The Japanese vacated the Northern
Brazil sz, leaving a transport behind in order to cover their
withdrawal. The American task force finally set sail with three
infantry
loaded transports and a sub.
Exactly 17 die rolls later the US retreated its last transport to
Panama
while the crew of the Japanese transport watched from the rails
~ many
of the sailors thumbing their noses and mooning the American ship
as it
withdrew from Brazilian waters. This transport was immediately admitted
to HC's Hall of Fame, and replaced on the board by a Japanese Battleship
in honor of its combat prowess.
The Commander noted that, should he build a special shelf for his
'Hall
of Famers', it would be overcrowded before the construction was
completed. Having witnessed High Cmmdr's "skill on demand" dice
rolls
firsthand, I'm forced to agree.
This is just a small sampling of what IAPPA members can expect during
the Memorial Day weekend in Fredricksburg, when the association
holds
its annual convention. There will be talk about "Lucky Dice Cups",
"Lucky Dice", etc., etc., etc. My question is: If we are all such
great
strategists ~ why do we need these luck enhancers? :)
Notes From the Front (Email Division)
Game 5403 ~ DreadSquid (Axis) vs. Saretano GM: Steiner
(After the Japanese attack in Haw sz)
This was a bad time for the Japanese to attack the U.S. You guys
claimed
you needed more space and materials for your industry. If you were
smart
you would have waited until after the holidays and you could have
made a
few more bucks for yoX-Mozilla-Status: 0009 Now, as we speak, people
all
over America are at Wal-mart returning any gifts that have the label
"Made in Japan". In fact, tomorrow we are broadcasting live on Channel
31 a huge bonfire of all Japanese products....so bring some
marshmellows.
Editor's Note: During the game the Germans had a few problems with
dice
during armor attacks. Thus the following exchange.
Allied player: tsk,tsk,tsk.....don't you know that you can't change
history. I hope Hitler has a bullet ready for when the SAINTS COME
MARCHING IN!!!!
Axis player: The Saints? The Saints?!? Not even Patton could make
them
winners! (Although he might be able to teach the Germans how to
use a
tank.)
Game 5403 ~ Cipkenop (Axis) vs.
Boromir
(A failed US attack on German forces as described by the players)
Combat: #1 softening Germany
WSp. SZ. 2 FTR to Ger.against a load of stuff....
*** double snake eyes on the AA
sickening dice rolls and bad flying send Americas flying boozos
into the
side of a hill.
Game 5682 ~ Immelman (Axis) vs. Ender GM: ToddVomit
3) UK SZ= 1UK BB+ 1UK trn + 1 Rus trn
sub from Wsp (OOL)
Fighter from EEu, lands EEu
Fighter from Ger, lands EEu
A1: 3/1,3......2 hits the two trans go down in the dawn........
D1: 1,1/1......Choking......hang on a sec guys.......WOW!....the
allied
radar helps the gunners find their marks..........the BB HMS Rodney
survives the carnage, no luftwaffe units return to tell the tale.....
A&A Pet Peeves
Ever have a GM really go off the deep-end in one of your games? I
can
think of two games where my GM began frothing at the mouth over
something that had happened. The best one was when my opponent wrote
TAAC at the end of a battle which involved only infantry and armor
in
the attack force. The GM wrote something like, "ALL GROUND BATTLES
ARE
TAAC YOU NINCOMPOOP!!!!"
I was thankful he was upset with my opponent instead of me, and
was
v-e-r-y careful with my special orders for the duration of the game.
(I
still lost.)
My pet peeve pertains to the manner in which some players write their
orders. Some players seem to believe that writing overly descriptive
orders is in the same ballpark as composing an alternate reality,
or
creating a running commentary based on the direction that a game
has
taken. "It's not the same ballpark, it's not the same league. It
ain't
even the same sport!"
I feel that orders should be as brief as possible, while still providing
all the necessary information. Orders which contain unnecessary
information increase the possibility of errors by either the GM
or the
opponent.....or both. That is, of course, if they make it thru the
entire sentence without dozing off. Here are three examples of a
non-combat order; first the type of order that drives me bonkers;
and
then two examples which provide the same information clearly and
concisely.
1. Transport in Japan sz loads 1 inf from Japan then sails to the
Philippine sz where it loads 1 inf from the Philippines and then
sails
to the Burma sz where it comes to rest and disembarks both of the
inf
into Burma.
2. 2 inf (Japan/Phil) to Burma via 1 trn from Japan sz to Burma sz.
(Most players can figure out that the trn stopped in the Philippines
before reaching its destination. Only a handful will assume that
the
Philippine infantry swam all the way to Burma.)
3. 2 inf (Jap/Man) via 1 trn (Jap sz) to Burma
(All you need is the origin and the destination. Describing every
minute
detail of their route is not only a waste of time, but also insulting
to
your opponent, since it infers that he doesn't have the intelligence
to
figure it out on his own.)
Knight Muse
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If you want to play the best A&A players in the world, look no
further
than IAAPA. I have played about twice as many email games as I have
played using the CD ROM version of A&A. Email play allows the
player to
plot out his strategy, to fine tune his battle plan, while CD play
encourages speed. Playing a CD game can be very good for the ego,
however, when you find yourself on a losing streak in your email
games.
I haven't seen a single CD player, even those considered the best
in
that format, who was better than an average IAAPA member. Unfortunately,
however, with its emphasis on speed, the CD format decreases skill
as a
factor, and increases luck in the win equation ~ so don't count
on an
easy win every game :)
EK
Squires Needed
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Got a humorous A&A anecdote? Got an A&A Pet-Peeve? Have you
got ANYTHING
that'll be even slightly interesting to your fellow IAAPA members?
Anyone with even a tiny sense of humor is welcome to step forward
and
share it with the rest of the association. Let's turn this new Havoc
into the best there ever was. Send me your stories, cut-n-pastes,
ideas,
suggestions, WHATEVER to either Errnt Knt@aol.com ~ or ~
havoc@axisandallies.net ~ Let's have fun, and share that fun with
all of
IAAPA.
Oh. One other thing. You won't find Errnt Knt among the association
membership. This is a pseudonym. I have chosen to remain anonymous
so
that I can report to you without fear of reprisal!
Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain, and don't be surprised
if someday, somewhere, someone comes up to you and says, "Smile!
You
made it into the Havoc."
Errant Knight
This month's contributors:
cwmcbride
MicWil
High Cmmdr